Through the Ages

In any large group of humans, we tend to sort ourselves off into smaller pods. After reading comments to a previous post from Jess and BB I realized that age, however, is not the primary catalyst for glomming together. Most often, we group around shared interests.

Once it was easy to label some "interest" groups by age. You would think moms-with-kids might be one. But you would be wrong. My own mom was halfway through her 40's walking my youngest sib to pre-school. I know she sometimes felt the culture shock, discussing toddler-parenting with women 20 years her junior. Today, a generation later, I expect those recital audiences are even more peppered with salt 'n pepper hair as women delay the mom thing.

The Retired Man club used to be another mono-aged thing. At the mall, their cold weather clubhouse, I would see the cluster of golf capped heads, bobbing and nodding. Now I know men who retire in their fifties. Caught between senior manager and senior citizen, they don't have much in common with the chin-whisker crowd.

But there are lots of interests that cross all lines. At the video store, I check in with the guy who dresses emo style because he and I often have similar reactions to movies. After I've seen something unexpectedly good I like to compare notes with him.

At our village library the children's librarian (my age) is the go-to person for recommendations. If you need a book for a 12 year old, you can definitely trust her advice. Her suggestions don't come from the latest ALA Best of the Best pamphlet but pesonal experience. Her at-home reading choices are most often new releases for the junior high crowd. I bet her grandchildren get the best Christmas and birthday books!

And as for me, though I have neighbors whose lifestyle and age more closely match mine, my best friend in the neighborhood is young enough to be my...granddaughter (if we lived in another state). We walk and talk, and talk while we walk. We pick apart the same earthshaking topics you discuss with your age mates: what we're reading, watching, buying, cooking.

One of the reasons I feel more connected with her is that we have the same attitude about new ideas, trying new products, embracing the latest technology. Neither of us is shy about taking a controversial idea for a test drive. Our separate forays through society let us enhance each other's perspective.

We step carefully around the age differences. I curb my eagerness to dispense the wisdom of history but when I can't, she listens politely. She may complain about her parents, never hinting that they're almost my age. I may complain about younger co-workers but never attribute their shortcomings to yout'.

Even though we usually have similar opinions, still we provide each other with windows into different worlds. Hers is full of child-raising theories and husbandly foolishness. Mine is about doing something, just because I want to. "You're so lucky" she marvels.
y'think?
"I've paid my dues" I remind her.